Why I Do this Work

As a young adult transitioning from a family facing it's own struggles, I was driven by a deep need to understand myself. I wanted to know what was “wrong” with me, why people behaved the way they did, and how I could help children who felt as lost as I once did. I wanted to be the kind of helper I needed growing up—someone who could nurture a child’s sense of belonging and help them recognize that they truly matter.

My goal was always to encourage children to see their strengths, to feel capable, and to understand that even when life feels difficult, they have value and purpose within their communities. I wanted to work with kids and make a meaningful difference in their lives.

What I didn’t expect, however, was to fall in love with parenting—both as a concept and as a field of study. As I began working more closely with children, I realized that a child’s well-being is shaped not only by their own experiences but by the relationships and dynamics surrounding them—especially those with and between their parents. This realization guided my doctoral dissertation, which explored the impact of parenting education on parenting itself. I became deeply fascinated by the complex interplay between parenting personalities and child development, and how these interactions influence the formation of a child’s personality. Research, writing, and learning became another unexpected passion.

About ten years ago, I found myself doing parenting plan evaluations—a challenging and often emotionally charged area of work. It was here that I witnessed both the best and hardest parts of human relationships: love intertwined with fear, protection mixed with pain, and the ways unresolved conflict can echo through a child’s sense of security and belonging.

The work is not without its challenges.

Our court systems are often backed up and overburdened, creating delays that can prolong uncertainty and stress for families. At times, I encounter legal professionals who, despite their expertise, may focus more on litigation than on the well-being of the families involved. When mental health concerns are overlooked in favor of pursuing contentious cases, children and parents can be caught in the crossfire, and the adversity they experience can have lasting and detrimental impacts.

One of the most heartbreaking challenges I witness is when parents, caught up in the pain and stress of divorce, start acting from their own hurt and unhealed wounds. Sometimes, their hurt and need to protect themselves take over, and they lose sight of what’s best for their kids. I’ve watched as the anger between parents becomes stronger than their love for their child, and as feelings of failure and discouragement make it hard to focus on what really matters. In these moments, children can end up feeling invisible and stuck in the middle of their parents’ struggles, instead of getting the support they need. Despite the difficulties, I remain committed to this work because I believe it is a critical way to advocate for children and families.

At its core, the Family Guidance Center is rooted in Adlerian principles of encouragement, belonging, and social interest. We believe that when parents feel capable and supported, they can create family systems grounded in cooperation, empathy, and respect. By helping families avoid unnecessary court battles and keeping the focus on the children, we create opportunities for healing, learning, and growth. Families can build a foundation for the future based not on conflict, but on courage.

I do this work because I want kids to know they matter. I want to help parents heal their own wounds so they can focus on nurturing their children. Because I believe that in the midst of change and loss, families can find their way forward.  I believe that while the shape of the family may change, their capacity to love, support, and raise healthy children together can remain strong.

Dr. Jenny Seiss is a licensed psychologist and founder of the Family Guidance Center, specializing in high-conflict family dynamics and child-focused custody evaluations.